Earlier today, CEPU members employed at Telstra received an email from Telstra CEO Andy Penn.
Some of it may be difficult to comprehend, particularly after 81% of you less than two weeks ago told them their penny-pinching pay offer was unacceptable.
So we’ve called in our old mate Andy Penn-ypincher to translate it for you. Please see below.
In the meantime, we will continue to bargain in good faith to advance your claims for a new, fair EA at Telstra.
Yours faithfully,
SHANE MURPHY
BRANCH SECRETARY
Hi Team,
Less than two weeks ago 81% of you told me where to shove my penny-pinching pay offer — which is actually a real terms pay cut for both Workstream and Job Family employees.
I appreciate that not only was the pay cut a tough pill to swallow, but our transfer of business/employment changes that could put your ongoing job security, pay, conditions and redundancy benefits at risk were also unacceptable.
However, it appears highly unlikely at this point that we will be able to reach agreement on pay in the coming weeks. This is because we’re wasting your Union’s time by setting up meetings for show, when in reality we’ve already made up our minds — we ain’t budging!
Therefore, we’re going to go ahead and dish our penny-pinching pay deal out to you anyway — under policy and unprotected by an EA. This means if we get into enough trouble and need to claw back this most generous pay increase (even if it is a pay cut in real terms) — WE CAN 🙂
As I shared previously, this is a challenging period for the company and this is having a range of impacts. Just last week, I announced that my executive team and I wouldn’t receive an increase in our fixed pay 🙁
But please, don’t feel sorry for us — I promise you, we’ll be just fine. I mean — did you know it would take you, the average Telstra worker, 200 years of working for us to be able to earn what we do collectively in just twelve months?! Plus — we still have our bonuses 🙂
I promise, we still want a new EA. But this will be on our terms, not yours.
To continue giving us the serve we deserve, please jump on Yammer and let her rip.
Andy $$
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